Tired in Texas
Published 8:14 am Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Please help me with my problem. I’m sure I’m not the only one who deals with this. It’s my husband. He eats, sleeps and dreams sports.
Right after the Super Bowl, he can’t wait for the start of Nascar. Sunday afternoons are spent watching cars go endlessly around in circles. It doesn’t matter whether we have guests or not, as such-and-such a race in such-and-such a city takes precedence over everything. I can’t imagine a Sunday afternoon without the sound of car engines filling our living room.
When March comes in, so do the college basketball tournaments. Every weekend. It seems each game is a must-see because this team might upset that team or so-and-so might score a lot of points. My husband tells me there are 64 teams in this thing, Rex. Sixty-four teams!
After college basketball, golf kicks in. Every weekend. Grown men spending Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday hitting a little white ball in a hole with a stick. And my husband sitting there watching them as the house falls in disrepair.
Not to mention baseball. A thousand games all summer long, filling in between Nascar and golf.
But I’ve saved the best (or worst) for last. I think the first nine months of the year simply serve to prime him for his favorite sport of all. Football.
Come September, all of life stops to pay homage to pigskin. A bunch of crazy men running into each other for three hours, after which a bunch more do the same thing. It takes a week to recover from bruises and injuries before they can do it again. College football. Pro Football. Thursday night, Friday night, Saturday afternoon and night, Sunday afternoon and night, and even Monday night! It never stops! Like a walrus, my husband parks himself in front of that box, surrounded by those things he considers essential to life. Chips, beer and pizza.
All the while the trim needs painting, the bathroom sink is dripping, the car could use a vacuuming and shingles are slowly coming off our roof. What am I to do! Even as I write this, my husband is sitting 10 feet away, oblivious to me, watching the Washington Redskins play the Dallas Cowboys. Can you help me ?- Tired in Texas
Dear Tired: I certainly understand your frustration, and I believe I can help. I would go with the Redskins. I know they have a young quarterback, but he should improve with age. If the team remains healthy and picks up some good wide receivers, they should be playoff bound. I hope you have a winning season.